DRNK TXT

CLOCKWORK: I am alone in my friend's apartment with a bunch of booze. Is this awesome?
ME: Depends on what you plan on doing with all that booze
CLOCKWORK: Absorb it into sponges and hide it around the apartment?

Laisse tomber les filles

Turkey Day

This is where my baby brother decided to play photographer. He's not that bad...although attempting to get into the shot was tricky...





Holidays with dad were pretty much how they always are...depressing. My dad's life is just kind of really really...sad. And that's unfair. Even his Christmas tree was sad. It made Charlie Brown's look good. I really worry about my dad these days. Not really sure what to do for him, though...

Getting away from that...Alicia and I couldn't stop listening to this song in the car. I think that I actually enjoy rap when it's in another language...



The video kind of ruins it for me though. I mean can you get any more "rap video" than that?

Hey Fenton here comes a car (Honk Honk)

Today I swerved out in front of this car, who was pretty far back anyway, and he got all honky so I gave him the finger. He basically chased me down and honked some more. So I threw him another bird.

I'm becoming a regular contributor to road rage...

Anyyyyway, Thanksgiving! A day of thanks. Or giving.

My sister and I plan on bringing Thanksgiving dinner to my dad. Bob's mashies, rotisserie chicken, and green bean casserole. Fuck turkey. I was actually supposed to see Clockwork for a minute (he's home on break, and my dad happens to live in the same town that he grew up in) but it looks like that might not happen now. I feel like we both want to see each other but things keep screwing up. He works on Black Friday and suggested I go see him at work, but by then I'd be back in Columbus. Then I suggested he come to a party this Saturday, and he seemed enthused but now his friend has other ideas. At this rate I won't see him for another two weeks! Boo. And then there's his whole ex thing. We haven't talked about her but I know she's still in the picture. Ugh. He said he'd probably be drunk dialing me on Saturday so...I guess I can look forward to that? Sigh...

I fear I have become a buttercup of winter.

So today was my birthday outing with Alicia. We had lunch at The Cheesecake Factory where we got a bit loopy off some beverages. Next we went and saw Twilight, and well...it was just...meh. I read the first book and really wasn't that impressed. People had been making such a big deal about it, and because I love Buffy, I thought I might enjoy this. But I...didn't. Not really. This is probably the first time I would say the movie is better than the book, only because the author is really a very mediocre writer. Though I can comprehend the Edward Cullen love. That man was chiseled out of marble. However, I don't understand how people find this romantic. Call me a realist, but this guy is not in love with her. He has literal blood lust. And she just thinks he's hot. Love at first sight does not exist. Lust, however, does. And that's what this is. How about you have a conversation first before you decide you want to be a vampire with him for all eternity?

Chicks.

whispers hello, i miss you quite terribly...

There was a moment last night, dancing to this song, that for some reason stuck with me. I felt, like...happy. A moment of clarity. It was nice.

Friday night's a bit lonely, change your plans and then phone me.

I kicked off last night with an adrenaline rush: I stole a parking spot...from someone who was about to parallel park...and it was amazing.

Let me paint you a picture...

At that point it was 11:30 and I had been driving around in my car for a half hour...driving around a crowded, noisy campus the day before a huge football game...holding the broken lever of my high beams on because my headlights stopped working...trying to get my feeble little arms to maneuver my steering wheel with no steering fluid...knowing I had to make the curfew I set for myself because I had to work early the next day...and being constantly reminded how shitty my car is from the never ending windshield wipers on delay because I can't turn them off.

So I stole the spot. And it was glorious. And I'd do it again.

Sam and Alex were in the car with me, freaking out. The people whose spot I stole (which, NO, it was MY spot. I was driving on the opposite side of the road, saw it, and had to quickly turn around. They happened to get right in front of me and I was not about to let them take it.) Anyway, they came back around and threw a CD at me. Didn't hit me. Don't know what that was meant to accomplish other than to make me revel in my glory. I compare the feeling with stealing a bid from under someone else's nose on eBay. I felt evil and gleeful. Sam and Alex thinking they were going to get shot only made it funnier.



So, I know that's a lot of time to devote to one story, but it made my night. If nothing else, I would always have that moment. Fortunately, my night was actually quite fun. We got to the party, tapped the keg, ran into a few people I hadn't seen in awhile, and I spent the majority of the night dancing with some kid. I felt a little bad because Nice Guy happened to show up to the party, and I could see him watching us out of the corner of my eye...like the whole night. It was weird. I tried to get Clockwork to come out, but he never returned my text. We had been texting earlier and I wasn't going to ask him to come out, because of the whole ex thing, but I got drunk and that of course impairs my judgement. I did try calling him later but his phone was off, so I'm thinking that might be the reason he didn't text me back. Or he was with her. Whatever. I prefer to keep my expectations low... But I ended up breaking my curfew and getting home around 4:30am. Had bout 3 hours of sleep. Then went to work. Hung over.

OSU vs. Michigan, Becca vs. Exam

So tonight is the grand old Ohio State vs. Michigan tradition of everyone jumping in Mirror Lake. Personally, I think they're all idiots. What's so great about hypothermia? It's cold, dammit! But it's tradition, and it's fun to drink and watch people act stupid.



Unfortunately, I have a stupid Psych exam tomorrow morning, so I have to stay in and study. Clockwork spent much time trying to convince me to go, but I really can't. Speak of the devil (literally, he was like the devil on my shoulder about blowing off school to go to Mirror Lake), he and I have been very...chatty. I mean, we talk every day and we never really run out of things to talk about. He did just get out of a relationship though, so I'm not trying to rush into anything. Things are definitely building though, which is nice. Slow is nice. I need a change of pace. He's seeing his ex tonight, though. Which blows. But he's been talking about how much he doesn't want to hang out with her because she wants to talk about getting back together. I was less convinced that he was over her, but he seems to really dislike her. So I don't know.

Here's a little snippet of our final conversation tonight:

CLOCKWORK: That bitch is just so dramatic.
ME: Well whatever. Just go and then see her after.
CLOCKWORK: I don't even want to. We're broken up, I don't have to take that shit.
ME: Just do what you want then.
CLOCKWORK: Um.... I wanted you to come out.......
(LONG PAUSE)
ME: ...Well I can't do what I want.
CLOCKWORK: I know that. I don't want you to fail your class. I won't bug you tonight, I promise.
ME: You can bug me a little...
CLOCKWORK: :)

AIDS beer and moochy felines.

CLOCKWORK: A beer materialized out of nowhere and you were shouting about it being an AIDS beer. So I drank first, and lo and behold, my sinuses are imploding. Is that something that happens?

(talking about my cat)
ME: We're more like roommates than family members.
CLOCKWORK: But the cat is an extra 20 bucks a month or so to feed and stuff. And he doesn't contribute.
ME: No. But whenever I want to kick him out for not paying for my utilities, he looks up at me with Bambi eyes and I'm out buying him more catfood...
CLOCKWORK: Oh yeah, thats how I got my mom to house me for more than 13 years. Of course the Bambi eyes only got me cat food as well...

Happy Barfday! ...Ohhh.

My birthday went well...and not so well. Depending on how you look at it, I guess. A bunch of my friends were bailing on me to go out to the bar, so I was bummed out when I met up with Clockwork and his friend at Ledo's. I got a $2 shot (because I only had $2) and then I suggested we head over to Sloopy's, a bar across the street, because Ledo's was lame. This turned out to be a good move because the new bar was a lot busier and fun. My other friends met up with us shortly and I was given ridiculous amounts of money to buy drinks. I haven't quite figured out how to master the art of getting the bartender's attention as they run back and forth, but I'll get the hang of it. I also vowed to take Clockwork down with me...I failed. To a point.









High/Lowlights of the night include:
-Not having to pay the cover charge because it was my birthday
-Stealing Clockwork's hat and then using Sam's scarf to make several new hats (beggar, Arab, pirate...)
-Trying to get Clockwork to dance with me and him almost dropping me (I landed on a chair) when he tried to dip me.
-Getting some hat wearing scruffy dude to buy me a drink at the bar (I definitely have a type...)
-Laying on Clockwork's shoulder while he looked through the pictures on my camera.

Several shots, rum and cokes, redbull and vodkas later...

Arm in arm with Clockwork we exited the bar to go to the hookah lounge down the street. Immediately after we got there I went to the bathroom to puke and there I stayed for the next hour or so. I tried to stick it out but the fumes made me super nauseous. I waited outside until Ruben and Sam came to walk me to the car and drive me home. Then I passed out on the bed.



So I acted a fool, but it was my 21st so...I do have a good excuse. And I've heard horror stories of even worse and embarrassing 21sts, so I'm just glad I didn't puke ON anybody or pass out in a puddle of my own vomit.

As for Clockwork...and not being sure if I was attracted to him...that's nonsense. He's adorably floppy and smart and funny. I dig him. And apparently all sorts of things were happening that night that I was unaware of until later. Like his friend telling him to make out with me already, and Sam and him having some kind of signal as to when he should do it because he didn't want to take advantage of me while drunk. Of course I screwed it all up by getting sick. Boo-urns. We texted a bit the next day and he said we'd have to do it again sometime soon. I like him, but he also has a lot of baggage in the form of an ex-girlfriend (it's a long story but apparently she's a "stalker" and he had to turn his phone off when we were at the bar because she kept calling him.) I don't want to deal with that. I really don't. And she's coming to visit him this weekend so they can "talk things through" and I don't know if he's over her so they'll probably get back together or some shit. Which is unfortunate, but...that's my luck.

I hope he doesn't fall for her crap...

Do-gooding do-gooder...

(looking up Weasley's stupid chick on facebook)
ALICIA: So it looks like she helped build houses for homeless people. And she has a bunch of pictures doing outdoorsy stuff.
ME: I know...all my pictures are like...drunk. She plays guitar, she's sporty and likes canoing and shit, she helps people, I hate her!
ALICIA: Haha. But she is not cute. There's a picture of her with a box full of kittens though, and that's pretty cute.
ME: She probably stole them...
ALICIA: She probably rescued them.
ME: SHUTUP!

Day of Birthening.

So my work is getting all Christmasy already. We put up a tree, holly around my desk and the fireplace, a santa over here, a reindeer over there...I have to admit, I do enjoy going to work and seeing all that. It gets me happy for Christmas and makes me feel cozy. Apparently I get to wear a Santa Claus hat in December, which sounds fun and festive to me. My co-workers decided it would be funny to play an elaborate prank on me though, so for a time I really thought it was true that I had to wear an ELF costume for the week of Christmas. Yeah. Real funny. Bastards.



Later Ben treated me to dinner at Applebee's since he couldn't be here for my night out. I got shrimp appetizers and a strawberry mojito. It was delightful. He did tell me though that Weasley is apparently really into that girl he was hanging all over. That put me in a foul mood. It's not like I was surprised, I basically knew, but it's just...bothersome.

Anyway, Clockwork and I have been talking pretty much every day since we met and he amuses me. I'm going out to a bar with my friends tonight and he's going to come, so this will be the second time we hang out. We'll see how that goes...I'll be back with plenty of pictures of drunken birthday shenanigans...mostly had...by me...

I'm thinking if I don't remember what happens tomorrow, it will have been a good night...

Warhol wisdom.

...or are you just happy to see me?

(talking about his cell phone holster)
NATE: It's just so I don't have a big bulge in my pocket.
ME: ....
NATE: TWO big bulges, I mean...
ME: ...
NATE: You know, if I'm holding my girlfriend's cell phone too.
ME: Please go.

Asian? Mexican? Indian?

Most of the time I look Asian. Other times I...don't. I can contort my face and become a completely different race. It's weird. And fun.

My drum teacher says my technique is improving. I'm glad. And I'm getting my new horizontal I.D. in the next coming days to prepare for the big 2-1 on Saturday. It's going to be so great to be able to just order a drink at the bar. I went to Canada after I turned 19 and ordered cosmos, crown and cokes, and martinis like the world was ending. I imagine Saturday will be much like that. I'm sure that soon I'll burn myself out on the novelty...

But until then....

Jordan Lee

So remember my friend Jordan? Well I got back in contact with him to tell him I dug his music and wanted a CD and he was kind enough to send me one!



I am LOVING "Starts Like This" and "Insomnia." He also sent some of his old stuff that I still need to listen to, but for now I'm happy that I can put these songs on my iPod.

I feel like I should save this for when he becomes famous...

Historic

What eloquence. I just love hearing him speak.

I'm busting through with all this election stuff because I don't know what to do with myself now that it's over! What am I going to DO with my life now that I can't get my election fix???? I'm a junkie. I lived off Politico, CNN, Huffington, Newsweek. I need a 12 step program...

Obamania.

(while watching Obama's speech)
ME: B Rock's making all the ladies swoon.
CLOCKWORK: Of course he is. He has a winning smile.

Remember remember, the 4th of November...

Also, I just love this:


America, I love you sometimes.

President Obama!

I live in a fucking BLUE state! Way to go, Ohio. You done good this time.

This day is fucking amazing. Life is amazing. America is amazing. Wow. Amazing.

Ohio: GO BLUE!

Today I woke up at 6am, got dressed, drove to my local polling station, and voted in my very first election. I got there right when the polls opened, but I still had to wait an hour. Afterwards I got my little "I Voted" sticker, a coffee and a donut, and went home feeling so proud to be a part of such a historic day. I'm now at work for what I'm sure will be a long night ahead.

Earlier today after two of my Republican coworkers just got done hating on Obama, a potential client walked in with a shirt baring Obama's face and name in huge letters and 3 VOTE OBAMA buttons. I had to stop myself from laughing out loud at the fact that they would now have to do a 90 minute tour to sell this guy. It made my day. Actually, Obama winning the election will make my day. Only time will tell...

I leave you now with the dorkiest email I have ever receieved:

If your phone still isn’t on you should come over tonight. I made election day cupcakes! CUP-CAKES! CAKES IN TINY LITTLE CUPS! For election day!

Oh my. Goodbye.

I can always count on my sister for such elevated forms of nerdiness...not that I don't love it...and yes, I will probably be claiming my election day cupcakes...

Just a reminder...

Bedways is rightways.

Welly, welly, welly, welly, well.

My weekend was quite interesting. Attended a Halloween party on Friday dressed as a boxer. It turned out a bit lame so I wandered off to another party with Torrek, which was just as lame, but I had to work in the morning anyway so it mattered not.

Saturday I hit up another party with Samantha, this time dressed as a referee (the previous night I had forgone "slutting it up" so I figured I might as well go for it then...fishnets really do a whore make...). This party was a lot more fun, drinkin beers beers beers, rollin fatties, smokin' blunts (actually I more just watched a guy get high out of an apple...I guess you can get high out of anything...), blowing my whistle and yelling "Yellow card!" at everyone, bobbing my head with Steve Butabi, running away from the puppet from Saw, calling Shooter McGavin a douchebag who eats pieces of shit for breakfast...it was a time.



I did meet this one kid who might be my soul mate, who knows. Earlier I had been telling Sam that I really really wished someone would dress up like Alex from A Clockwork Orange. I just really wanted to see it. This guy, who wasn't dressed up, happened to hear me talking about it and said that was his costume the night before! So we ended up hanging out most of the night, and eventually we all ended up at his dorm (he used his laundry money to pay for my parking haha.) He lives in one of the nicer dorms in the towers (Jeffrey Dahmer lived in the tower dorms at OSU, FYI). We went outside at these picnic tables to smoke (cept me) and I ended up resting on his back for warmth and somehow we ended up holding hands...I don't know, it was cute. I like when things aren't so obvious. The majority of the night was spent in the common room of his dorm, hanging out with his friends, playing Mario Kart, and holding anything frozen (I forgot to mention, I burned my hand on a curling iron right before I left for the party, so I was in agony most of the night if I wasn't holding something cold. Drinking also numbed the pain, but anytime I got near sober...ohhh...needless to say, I was made fun of quite a bit, holding onto ice cream bars and frozen veggies.)

Around 5am he and I headed to his room to sleep (I noticed his Alex costume on the dresser.) Unlike Nice Guy, who felt entitled to accost me because I dared share his bed, this guy (let's just call him Clockwork) was fine to just let me sleep. Woke up around 8:30am, he rode down the elevator with me, we said our goodbyes and that was that.



I only got a few hours of sleep, woke up again hungover and Alicia came to take me to lunch. We went to The Melting Pot for fondue, which was pretty much amazing, except I think I would have enjoyed it more if my head weren't pounding the whole time. Later on I tried to find Clockwork on Facebook, but I didn't have any luck. I doubted I'd ever see him again, being that he wasn't an acquaintance of any of my friends and I had no idea where or how to locate him (without stalking him at his dorm.) I did end up finding him, but I stopped short of friending him. I felt like he would have gotten my number before I left if he was that intent on seeing me again. Then I woke up today to find he had friended me...so...we'll see what happens, I guess...

A marvelous pun.

(dressed as a sperm)
COREY: I live in the testes! And I'm getting so TESTY!