Swine Flu can kiss my grits

I'm back from New York. It was a blast, but before I get into that, I have much to fill you in on, so let's take a couple steps back...

BODEGA & LADIES '80S
For the past month my Thursday night routine has been drinking at this hipster bar in the Short North called Bodega with Clockwork, Mike, and Ruben, then going to Skully's for Ladies '80s. It's typically a really fun night. Three Thursdays in a row however was becoming a bit of an overkill. Bodega has become one of our main hangout spots though, not that I'm complaining because it's a pretty cool bar. It's through these nights that I've become better friends with Ruben, who I certainly consider one of my close friends now, as well as Mike, who is really more just Clockwork's friend, but he's a good dude.







EASTER
Every Easter we go to my Aunt Bebe's, but Alicia and I hadn't been for a few years so we decided to make the trek to Newark this year. We took some backwards ass country road and ran into a place called Western World. We actually drove by it, saw some crazy looking cowboy statue, and decided to turn around and take some pictures with it. This place was totally secluded so we decided this was an alright embarrassing photo opportunity.




A car actually came around when I was trying to get a second picture of Alicia, and I accidentally had it on video instead of picture, so the following is us running hysterically so that this car won't see us acting a fool...



Sidenote: I saw a dead bunny on the side of the road that day.


APRIL FOOL'S
I really wanted to play an April Fool's joke on Clockwork, but I couldn't come up with anything. Turns out that was the best prank of all, because I acted like I had this big thing set up and I got him completely paranoid about it. Here is an example of our conversations:

MIDNIGHT, MARCH 31ST-
ME: Tomorrow is April Fool's Day. Stay Sharp.
CLOCKWORK: Don't worry, I won't believe anything you tell me until 12:01 April 2nd.
ME: Who said I'm going to tell you anything? Night!

2PM, APRIL 1ST-
ME: My prank may or may not involve people you know, and it may or may not already be in motion.
CLOCKWORK: That's not fair! Mike just called me but I didn't pick up because I suspected something...
ME: That may or may not have been wise.

7PM, APRIL 1ST-
CLOCKWORK: I called Mike back and he didn't pick up. Was that your pathetic prank?
ME: If it helps get you through the day...then yes. Yes it was.
CLOCKWORK: ...you think you're so quick...

I eventually got sick of keeping up with the charade, but it was fun while it lasted.

LOVE.
On April 17th at 3am, our 2 month anniversary, Clockwork and I were returning from dropping everyone off after a night at Ladies '80s. It was raining and I was tired and cranky and sober. As we pulled up to his dorm, Clockwork grabbed my hand and told me he loved me. I've never had anyone say those words to me, nor have I ever said them to anyone I wasn't related to. All I know is that when I said it, I wanted to mean it. And I when I told him I loved him too, I did. And we sat in the car and kissed as it rained and I drove home on a high that being in love can only bring.

MEET THE PARENTS
Clockwork briefly met my dad when I went to Lancaster for awhile, and after our love declarations, I think Clockwork wanted me to get more involved with his family. His dad has been in Korea for about 2 years (he's a contractor) and he came back to Ohio for awhile, so Clockwork wanted us to meet. We went to dinner with his dad and step mom, then the next day we went to a cook out at his grandfather's (though it rained, so it turned into a cook in). It was a good time and I think I got along with most everyone. I don't think his uncle liked me because he still talks to Clockwork's ex, though he didn't say anything to me other than hello anyway. Clockwork says he doesn't care if his family likes me because all of his friends do, so I don't give a shit if his uncle likes his ex better. Clockwork likes me better and that's all that matters. It might get a little awkward when Clockwork has to move in with him in the summer (long story) but I won't worry about it.

ATHENS, OHIO
Clockwork promised his friend Hector that we'd visit in Athens one of these days, so we finally did. We drove down for this party and I met a bunch of his old friends. It was awesome because whenever we hang out with this particular crew of people, someone always says how much better I am than his ex. People I knew for two minutes were like, you're so much better than that other girl. 10 people easily have said this exact thing. It makes me wonder if this girl was that bad or am I just that great? I'll go with the former, although I am pretty damn great. Like...Alexander. Or a...canyon. Wait, that's grand...well I'm grand too. Though not large....or vast....I'll stop talking...

NY ROAD TRIP
I'm super pissed I forgot my camera, so I don't have any pictures to share, but uh, here:


I was there!

So Mike invited Clockwork and I on an all expenses paid weekend trip to New York. The main point of the trip was to get Mike laid, as he invited this girl he liked, who clearly was not that into him so it was slightly awkward. She was a really sweet girl, just incredibly spacey and a bit ditzy. Anyway, we left on Friday afternoon and the drive took us about 10 hours. We were all tired when we got there, but once we arrived we were all excited about being in the city that we went out to explore Times Square and drink. We ended up at this bar with live music and met some German guy named Tomas (who Clockwork, having forgotten his name, recalled as "Fritz"), we also bought tickets to a comedy show at the Laugh Factory (though we didn't end up going), and they bought pot from some guy on the street (more expensive in New York, but infinitely easier to do than in Ohio).

Actually, I have one picture from our hotel room. We stayed at the Chelsea Savoy in Midtown, which is basically next door to the famous Hotel Chelsea.



Mike paid for two rooms so it was really cool to kind of just be hanging out with my boyfriend in New York. We both decided we loved the city and want to move there immediately. People watching in New York is the best. I saw so many weird and random things. And I slowly became used to hearing cars honking every two seconds (New York City cab drivers may be the best or the worst in the world, I can't figure out which...). The next day we walked around a lot, went to Battery Park, Central Park, Time Warner Center, wandered Times Square and eventually ended up at a couple of bars. McGee's Pub was the first one, after we looked at D'or and realized it was one of those "Roxbury" type clubs, and since I was the only one dressed up for clubbing, we ditched the idea. We ended up chatting with a few people (one of which was a guy that had just landed a part in the broadway production of Dream Girls) who told us to go to The Whiskey Bar. It's an underground bar and it was pretty fun. Super expensive though, as 3 Bud Lights and a Jack and Coke cost $40. We also met some weird guy in the girl's bathroom who wanted us to come back to his apartment and he'd match us with pot, but Clockwork and I were the only ones who were thinking rationally and dragged Mike and the other girl out of there.

So we went back to the hotel around 3am, they smoked some pot, and I passed out in our room. Clockwork tried waking me up, but the room was twirling after 5 beers and I passed out. How sad is that? FIVE BEERS FUCKS ME UP. My glory days are loooong gone...On the drive back, we heard about the swine flu going around, and as Clockwork and Mike were both kind of sick (Clockwork's voice was pretty much gone), we started to worry. Actually, we freaked out, as Mike's stepmom told us there was a PANDEMIC in NEW YORK. We thought we all might be dying and almost made a pitstop to the hospital to check us all out. It was only later that we learned that this is ongoing in several states, so that calmed us down a bit. But still, what the hell man? Oh, I also left my phone in the back of a taxi and some guy called Mike, as he was the last one who called me. Mike goes, "What it is, slut?" and the guy was like, "Uhh, I'm not a slut, but I have this phone..." Mike felt bad later because he was such a nice guy haha.

Anyway, now I'm waiting for Clockwork to get out of a Black Keys show so we can hang out, trying not to die from swine flu...I'm fine, honestly. I'll be back sometime soon, but if not, try not to assume the worst.



xoxo

eta: Totally forgot to mention that I saw the waitress from "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" while I was in New York! She was chatting on the phone and walked right by me. I LOVE HER!

I'd have looked quite the fool..an April Fool as it were

So it looks like I may only have 1 entry in the month of April. It's hard to keep up without a computer...let's just call this an April Fool's joke.

Anyway, lots to say, no time to say it.

I will return with a new entry next week. We're going on a road trip to New York tomorrow so I am busy busy busy! Just know I am quite alive & happy :)

That's not fair. I'm really ticklish.

St. Patrick's Day was pretty fun and drunk, as it was also a celebratory event for finals being over. Clockwork's friend Mike invited us to see a Sublime cover band. He paid for our admission, bought us drinks the whole night...it was swell. The main reason he wanted us there was because a girl he liked was going and he wanted backup I guess. I'm a pretty good wing man if I do say so myself (after we left, Mike texted Clockwork with "What the hell did Becca say to her!? She's eye fucking the hell outta me now!"). Clockwork had one more final the next day, so I dropped him off for class and went to Corey's to hang out. We got smoothies and took a stroll along High Street. The weather was gorgeous so it was really nice. Afterward I got Clockwork, picked up some Chipotle, and we went back to my place. We wanted to go out again, as he was going home for Spring Break the next day, but I think everyone was too busy nursing their St. Patty's Day hangovers. Instead we played Guitar Hero, spied on my neighbors fighting, and tickled each other. Seriously. We tickled each other...for like an hour (I told him that if anyone asked what he did, he'd have to say he spent the night tickling his girlfriend, and no that's not code for something.) It was mostly hilarious... We also had another good talk that reassures me that we're too good together to let anything ruin us. I also like that he's constantly talking about things in the future...what we'll do in the summer...going to his family's annual Christmas party...clarifying our first date for future anniversary purposes. Hearing that puts me in a good mood :D

So today I had to drop him off at his dorm so he could leave me (he's coming back Saturday night, then going to Las Vegas until Wednesday! I can barely get through a day without him now, what the hell am I supposed to do? I want Vegas dammit...). Then I went to lunch with my sister (patty melt/potato soup/fries/sundae...oh my ovaries...) Now I'm crampy from the time of the month and would like to skip home...



Tralalala...

Fromance

So Clockwork stayed over this weekend, as usual. I didn't really feel like going out Friday night, so we headed back to my apartment. He took the drive there to tell me that his EX had visited his grandma the other day, telling her that she was sad he had a new girlfriend. I was like....alright....because apparently she's friends with his grandma and his uncle. He says he's gonna talk to them and see if they'll just stop talking to her so he can get her out of his life. I feel like this girl is trying to have any connection to him at all and this keeps her around sortof. I told him it made me uncomfortable, and he said he wasn't thrilled either, but...I dunno. I feel like it won't be that easy to get rid of this girl. And it makes me so angry! She needs to just go the fuck away! I mean I'm going to meet his family sometime and I want them to like me. I don't want them wishing she was still around...

Anyway, we just lounged around Friday night, and most of Saturday until we went out to a bar for Mike's girlfriend's birthday. It was pretty fun. I was in a really good mood and the drinking put me in a really REALLY good mood. We had mostly pitchers and amaretto sours. Someone had a comb lying around and I totally teased Clockwork's hair into a fro. It was awesome.




On the way home he told me I made him really happy and then we started talking about our past relationships again. He told me more about the last time he talked to his ex, which apparently was early January, when she found out about me and told him to choose between us. He claimed there was no choice to be made because he didn't want to date her anymore. She said he made his choice and hung up. Now lately I've been having a lot of dreams where Clockwork cheats on me. I've told him about them and he says it's because there's a part of me that doesn't trust him. The thing is, I really DO trust him! He tells me all the time he'd never do that to me, and I believe him utterly. I just think I have lingering doubts in my head. And a big problem is HER. Especially since she's still attempting to be in his life.

It gets worse though...and it's my own damn fault...

On Sunday Clockwork was nursing a hangover and decided to go lay in the bed for awhile. I was sitting in the living room, all alone with his laptop....and well...I got curious! I went into his facebook and looked at old messages from her...and I wish so badly I didn't do it. One message that I read, dated Jan. 6th, which I know is the day she found out about me, said something along these lines:

"I know I didn't have a right to know about whats-her-name before, but I think that when we started hanging out a lot and sleeping together I deserved full disclosure."

This...hurt me. A lot. I mean, I know that technically I can't be mad about this, because it was during the period that we were still just friends and nothing more. But the thing that really gets to me is that he told me she always acted like he was still her boyfriend after they broke up...and before, when I would read the kind of messages she'd leave on his Facebook wall, I'd think she was crazy! Because I thought, who acts like that with someone you're not even with anymore?? But now it's like...well no wonder! You encouraged her by sleeping with her! That just...kills me. Like stabbing pains in my heart. And I can't say anything because he'll know I snooped. I need to bite the bullet, bury the hatchet, and keep my mouth shut. Because nothing good will come of this. He chose me obviously. I need to be happy with that....I just can't seem to get this new info out of my head :(

Afterwards I climbed into bed with him and hugged him while my mind raced with the time line of events and how and when they could have possibly started sleeping together. I'm thinking during Christmas break when he was back home, because she'd be back in Ohio for break too...when he woke up we talked and joked (he started kissing up my arm and as I said "I feel like Morticia" he went "Cara mia!") and I completely forgot about it, all day. I didn't give it a second thought. We met up with Ruben and Sam at the hookah bar later, and then BDubs to eat. It was a good time. Then I dropped him off at his dorm and went home....and that's when it came back into my head. I just need to let it go...I'm working on it... I sent him a text the other night telling him I missed him and good luck with finals. He sent me this:

CLOCKWORK: I miss you too. Thank you :) I think you're great and every time we do this weekend thing I like you more and more. I won't get bored of you and I don't want you to think that anymore.

...I think my heart trusts him, even if my head doesn't yet...

No more apples in the vending machine please

CLOCKWORK: Let's have sex.
ME: No.
CLOCKWORK: Well what if I get too drunk later?
ME: Just don't drink that much.
CLOCKWORK: But I wanna have fun!
ME: You're right. Why have sex when you can have fun?
CLOCKWORK: Wait, that's not what I meant!
ME: Oh don't worry, you can have all the fun you want tonight. I won't make you have sex. Ew, sex, bleh!
CLOCKWORK: AGHHHHH!

Where's a be's a me's a?

Hrm, couple weeks since I last wrote. My days are busier now...filled with Clockwork time, sleep time, eat time...errr, that's about it.

A brief rundown? Hung out with Clockwork at: the movies (Wendy & Lucy...we left in the middle because nothing was happening...it's an entire movie of watching someone do things...that leads to nothing...but dammit if you didn't see her doing it.), at my place (he's been spending weekends here. It's just easier. Since he doesn't have a car right now I always have to pick him up when I want to see him. Weekends are the best!), at the grocery store (he made me get food because I ran out...and I made us bbq meatball subs and we watched movies and played video games and lazed...sigh), at bars (we've been slowly making our rounds...it's been fun...and drunk), at Momo's (a bowling alley/kareoke bar/pool hall/awesome place....)..., at Corey's (to hang and watch Zoolander and for a party. Muttons was there, but no drama, no attempts at making him jealous with Clockwork. We're friendly, that's it. I don't care anymore so it's easier to be nice. And THAT'S nice)....

The last couple weeks have been a bit of a blur. I did so much shit that I can barely remember what I did. This is what it costs to maintain a relationship I guess.

I like having a boyfriend :)

Possible Homersexual.

So Clockwork spent the weekend at my place...we might be up each other's butts just a little bit...

It started off on Friday night when I met up with him and his friend Jeremy at a bar. We shot the shit for a bit (meaning we discussed that Jeremy likes more meat on his girls than Clockwork, but if he were a girl, he'd like his man a little leaner) and then Clockwork and I met up with Mandy and Ruben at Skully's. This was certainly no Ladies '80s night. Skully's was dead. We decided to head over to Axis, a gay nightclub (I told you I'd get Clockwork there!) Drag queens, dudes in speedos taking showers? Makes for a pretty good time!







While we were dancing, some girl tapped Clockwork on the shoulder and was like, "Dance with these girls behind you!" Clockwork looks at her like she's a moron, as he's got his arms all over me, and I go, "Uhh, no," and turn away with him. We went back to dancing and as I thought about what just happened, I got super pissed. What the fuck! Clearly he's with me, who do people think they are? I had been jokingly worried about a guy trying to scoop him up, "Don't get gaynapped" I'd say when he'd leave to get a drink, and then some dumb slut comes over. We talked about it later and he was like, "I wanted to be like, I like the one I have, thanks, go away." That and having a gay guy tell me I'm a whore when he thought Clockwork might be a girl (he had his hoodie up) were pretty memorable for the night...







Saturday we spent being a couple of slugabeds and layabouts. We watched tv/movies (Vanilla Sky, Home Movies, The Virgin Suicides, Flight of the Conchords) and then Clockwork forced me to be semi-productive by going to take care of my car crap. The van ("Vanny") wasn't starting, and because I have to give the car back now, I needed it to drive me to and fro. We went to Applebee's to eat and then Target to buy toilet paper and jumper cables (see how practical he makes me?). Then we headed off to my sister's to jump Vanny. It was raining/snowing and I was worried that Clockwork might electrocute himself because he'd never jumped a car before (he was reading the directions in Spanish for christ's sake! "It's just English with 'o' at the end! I know what I'm doing!") Luckily he was successful, and I was glad to be able to introduce him to my sister and Tommy. They liked him, so that's just a nice bit of extra validation...

We were supposed to go out to see this Led Zeppelin cover band, but I wasn't really feeling that well and we were laying all dozy on the couch, so we stayed in. Then today we slept in, I took him home and went and saw Coraline 3D with my sister (FYI: That movie...SO not for children! Buttons for eyes!? Ahhh!)

There are lots of things about this weekend I'd like to remember...

-I made him a grilled cheese with tomato soup for breakfast and he proclaimed me amazing.
-He played the guitar while I got ready (he's good)
-He likes how I carry myself. That might be one of the more understated compliments I've ever gotten. I liked it.
-He can pin point the moment he knew he really liked me: "You had beer, pizza with mushrooms, Simpsons...we made out and laughed because we were both paying attention to the jokes in the show. Then the next day you beat me in Guitar Hero and taught me how to play Hitman. That's when I knew I liked you."
-I impressed his friends and one of them said I was a keeper.
-We totally dorked out together in the mornings
-He says he can't remember when he's been happier...



And honestly, neither can I :)

Guess who.

FAVES

CLOCKWORK: I bought a book called Stuff White People Like. 11 is asian girls. 29 is 80s night. 33 is pot :D

He's my Southern Comfort.

I've had a lot more free time, obviously, without a job. I managed to finish a couple paintings. There's probably some kind of symbolic meaning behind a naked woman running from something without any limbs...



Clockwork came over a few days ago, after I found out that because I got laid off, my car loan wouldn't go through. I was feeling down and he cheered me up. We ordered a pizza and watched Home Movies...and drank. It's weird, I feel like everything is falling apart now that I finally have my love life figured out. I told him that after the job and the car, he'd be the next to go. He says he's not going anywhere, but I'm still waiting for it...




I really don't know what to do. I need to have a job by the end of the day today or else I have to bring the car back. Fucking economy...alright, enough of this levity, wench. I'm off to find employment.

<3Day

ME: So are you my Valentine?
CLOCKWORK: ...You know I am.



Isn't that dress killer?? Paired with black heels, my legs look a million miles long. I look 5'10, it's awesome. So we went to dinner at Bento Go Go (teriyaki chicken/rice and sushi) and then we went to Ravari Room for a drink. We were waiting on his friend to tell us when he'd be going to some party, so we ordered a few and decided to do that 25 Facts About Me on Facebook with eachother. At first everything he was telling me was stuff I already knew...then he asked me if I wanted to know stuff he wouldn't really just talk about...like the fact that he doesn't get attached to people, and that he gets unattached pretty easily ("But I'm pretty attached to you.") We had a pretty in depth conversation after that.

His friend finally called us and we headed over to this big party. It was cute because all of the friends I met would be like, "Oh so this is Becca!" I told him earlier that I wished he'd be more affectionate in public (he confirmed that he's not a big fan of PDA) and he said he'd work on it. During the party he would lead me around by the hand, offer me his hoodie, cuddle with me when I was cold...it was nice. Afterwards we went over to his friend's house, then to Andyman's, this little hole in the wall bar across the street where his friend bought Clockwork some birthday shots/drinks. He hit a 9. I was glad he was able to finally celebrate with all of his friends. By the time we left to go back to his dorm, he was a 10. It was hilarious.

We were laying in his bed and he was falling asleep, but he always insists on walking me out (down the elevator 18 stories, through the lobby, down the steps, to the parking lot, sheesh) so he kept trying to stay awake. He started to drift off and this is how our conversation went:

ME: Just go to sleep, I'll let myself out.
CLOCKWORK: But I have to see you go.
ME: Why? It's cold, you're dead tired, just kiss me goodbye now and then fall asleep.
CLOCKWORK: But I miss you.
ME: ...I'm right here...
CLOCKWORK: But what about our plans later?
ME: ...It's 5am. What plans are you talking about?
CLOCKWORK: Weren't we gonna go do...that...thing?
ME: Um, no...
CLOCKWORK: (SNOOOOORE)

I went home a little bit after that and texted him this line:



The Simpsons is our thing. He knows. I love it.

I had to go to a birthday dinner for my grandma the next day. We all went to Bob Evan's for some down home cookin. My aunt told me she "pulled a Becca," which is apparently staying out till 5am and waking up at 2pm...which I also did last night...so, uh, yeah, that's a Becca...





So I think Clockwork and I are together now. His friend called me his girlfriend, and then later asked me what we were. I said I didn't know, and he told me I was Clockwork's girl. From everything he's told me, that he thinks about me every day, has since we met, told his ex about me 2 weeks ago and isn't friends with her anymore now because she flipped out about it...I know.

He choo choo chooses me :)

Play by Play of the WEEK

It started off pretty shitty with getting laid off, but things with Clockwork and I have gone pretty well since!

TUESDAY
For his birthday we went out to the bars with his friend Mike and then Ruben met up with us a bit later. It was mostly a low key event. I tried to get him drunk and silly, but on a scale of 1-10, he was mostly at a 6 for the rest of the night.

Sidenote: Clockwork got a haircut last week and told me he was wary of my seeing it because everyone who did had laughed at him ("Ask yourself...do you really want to see a haircut that has been described as both Elijah Wood and Jonas Brother?"). I saw it...looked pretty queer...didn't tell him that...

WEDNESDAY
My first REAL day of being unemployed. I met with my advisor in the morning, went to lunch with Ruben at Mongolian Barbecue (AWESOME) and then decided to take a never ending nap. I've been spending most of my days in bed...it's good now, taking advantage of what I was deprived of for so long (KISS MY ASS, CORPORATE AMERICA!) but I'm think it's gonna get old pretty damn fast...

Sidenote: The "Clueless" soundtrack is more awesome than I remembered! Listen to "We Are Young" by Supergrass and just TRY not to feel giddy!

THURSDAY
Ladies '80s night at Skully's was a BLAST! Mandy and I couldn't figure out if we should dance like we normally do or as if we were in the '80s...a medley seemed to work. Clockwork actually danced with me (he never dances) and he's really not that bad. I liked getting him out of his comfort zone.

Sidenote: Clockwork's hair looked super hot that night. He also had some v-neck wifebeatery sleep shirt on that was super hot. I found him super hot. Have I said super hot enough? Super hot.

FRIDAY
Met up with him and Nathan at the hookah lounge, then we went to a party. Afterwards we went to Mike's and watched the new episode of The Flight of the Conchords and drank some more. There was this Breast Cancer Awareness Vodka in the fridge, but nothing to mix it with. I made Clockwork take a quick shot with me, and it totally made him sick. I felt so bad, especially cuz he was fine before the shot (awful vodka, tasted like rubbing alcohol. Clockwork thought he might have breast cancer after that...)

Sidenote: You'd think I would find it off-putting to see him throw up (well I didn't SEE him, but I was rubbing his back while it was happening.) But it didn't change my opinion of him at all. I've had people leave the room, puke, and come back out and wanna make out with me. THAT is gross, especially when the person is disgusting. Clockwork brushed his teeth, walked Nathan (who was completely stumbly drunk) to his dorm, brushed his teeth again, and then came back out to say goodbye to me. I thought that was considerate.